14 Weeks Post Op - Worse than pre surgery

I just forced myself to walk around the block. My low back is about as bad as it was presurgery -severe pain on the left side. My low back feels like its gone downhill in the past few weeks. I can't say its because I've overdone it because I haven't done much due to my neck pain. So that is really discouraging. My neck is horrible and continues to burn.

I made a macaroni salad for a cookout we are going to later and it took everything I had to do that. I was out of breath , my neck was burning. And yes, we could go to the store to buy it but my girls have been asking for the kind that I make it and I enjoy making it. Its as if I want to prove to myself that I can do something, anything small. But the sad part is that I really can't.

Its also awful because I look absolutely fine. I think its hard for anyone to understand especially if they didn't know me before this all began. I don't want sympathy, I just wish it was more understandable.

My mom is going to take the two littlest girls for the next several weeks. I had to tell my job that I cannot work. These are not decisions that I made lightly - these are horrible choices to have to make. Accepting that I cannot do my job at home with the kids or at work.

This is as much a journal for myself now so that I can chronicle the pain and hopefully look back at this and read that I've made improvements.

Results of Cervical MRI 5-22-08

Well, I had a cervical MRI on Tuesday and we met with the doctor for the results today. I'm not sure what I expected or wanted to hear but MORE PHYSICAL THERAPY was not it.

I have a small bulge at c5-c6. He thinks that is typical for my age and is not the cause of my neck pain. Another reason he doesn't think its this bulge is the fact that it is on the right and my numbness, tingling is on the left. Of course, I can remember the first results of my lumbar MRI and the doctors saying that degeneration at my age is normal. Well that pain was not normal among anyone else my age that I know. So, although I want to believe that I think the jury is still out.

So, he insists that I now see his highly experienced PT for more aggressive treatement. He says this therapist will know in a few weeks if he can fix me. I'm aggravated because I've gone to another PT for several weeks now with no relief and just wish that the doctor had started me with this one to begin with. Now, my kids are out of preschool so I have to hire a sitter and drive to downtown to go to these appointments.

He prescribed Arthrotec and said I should know in a week if that is working.My husband came with me to the appointment. He's normally quiet but this time he explained how this is affecting (ruining) our lives. He's had to stay home from work because I can't take care of the kids. My mom is searching for plane tickets to take the girls up North with her for a long stay to give me relief. We told him I'm crying in pain every night but the doctor just says that its going to take "a lot longer than I would like" to get better.

I can't say much more except that this really SUCKS!!!!

MRI was this morning

I had a cervical MRI this morning. I won't have any results until the doctors appt next Thursday.

I had a Toradol shot last week and started the medrol dosepack this week. The shot helped my low back but not my neck. The medrol hasn't made any difference.

Severe neck pain continues. Its actually a burning now at the back of my neck. And it has moved into the sides and front of my neck which I would describe as a strain. I have a lot of "popping" in my shoulder and hips whenever I move.

Will update after dr. appt next week.

Doctor says its bad genes

I saw the doctor this morning. He xrayd my neck which shows some degeneration at C5-C6 but he doesn't think that is the source of the pain. He feels that is consistent for my age. I'll have an MRI on May 27th which may or may not give us some more insight. If that is inconclusive then he'll order an EMG. He firmly believes that the low back surgery had NOTHING to do with my neck problem. He says its purely coincidental. The bottom line is that he says I have bad back genes.
I am trying so hard to keep positive that this will go away but actually hearing that its unrelated to the surgery has made it harder to believe that.

I follow up with him on June 5th so we'll see where that gets us.

11 weeks post op - Dr. appt in the AM

I have been going to Physical Therapy three times a week for my NECK!!!! Its so ironic. We do some small core strengthening after we've worked my neck but not much. The terrible spasms have subsided but I cannot sleep without muscle relaxers. I am just in shock that this has happened. Surgery on lumbar spine and now I have neck problems which I never had before.

I go to the doctor tomorrow morning and am requesting (demanding if needed) an MRI on my neck. I need to know if there is degeneration there. If it shows nothing then I will have patience that this is going to work itself out over time.

I can barely comment on my low spine because it seems better, sore but not as painful as prior to surgery. However, I have remained so limited in my activity levels its hard to tell where its really at right now.

I will update after the doctor tomorrow. I have to miss Muffins for Mom at my daughters preschool because these appts are so hard to comeby. Luckily I have a dear friend taking her but I do hate how much this has interfered with my family life.

I will finally return to my part time customer service job in June which although I am looking forward to it, will be quite a challenge to sit at the computer as long as may be required.


More tomorrow.

Two months Post Op Update

Well I am on my own and back to life as best as I can. My mom has gone home. The neck continues to be the main source of my pain. Everyone asks but hows the low back - well it feels okay but because of my neck pain I can't really do enough to figure out where my low back stands. I walked on the treadmil today for an hour which equaled 2 miles. My left arm has been numb ever since and I have tingling in my left leg and foot. I am going to Physical Therapy three times a week which is mainly focusing on my neck at this point. I do some minor core strengthening and stretching but I can't do much until we get the neck figured out. I just cannot believe this has happened.

I still have all the same fears and concerns as my last posting, I'm just not as negative right now.

My friends have jumped in where my mom left off and are taking my kids for playdates a lot so I can rest. I accept the help but hate being in this position.

I hoped I'd be better by now but time will tell.

Week 7 - Rollercoaster Ride continues with increase neck pain

Well its been almost 7 weeks and as you read last week I was feeling real positive about my recovery and future outlook. This week - not so much. I've had neck pain for about a month now. My neck first began hurting about a week after I was home from Germany. I thought it was too much lying down and watching TV at eye level (I was dying to watch all the shows I had TIVO'd while I was gone - all they had in English over there was CNN) so we moved the TV up high like you'd see in a hospital. As the pain continued, I attributed it to the fact that I was walking and doing more so my muscles were overcompensating for my weak low back. As time progresses, this pain is becoming reminiscent of my initial low back pain years ago. It feels discogenic in nature now not muscular. The doctor last week thought it might be nerve related because my arms and hands are still feeling tingling and was too early for MRI which would be the only real diagnostic tool. I start PT on Monday and will continue that until I see the doctor again in exactly a month from now. I am EXTREMELY worried that my neck may have had "bad" discs just "waiting" to "go out". And that the added pressure on my neck has caused that to happen. Last week I talked to my girls about planting a vegetable garden next year, they want a dog which we haven't promised but its in our plans when I feel better, Disney World etc. etc. Now I'm back to thinking that I am going to have to go through this whole process with my neck? Is my life just going to be a long battle with back pain. If so, how am I going to get through it. Although this is not a life threatening condition it is certainly life altering and it REALLY SUCKS.

Dave my husband who has remained postivie thoughout and still continues to believe that I do not have neck degeneration says that he will eat meat during lent next year if my neck has been compromised. We don't attend church or follow any organized religion so now he may lose what little faith he has been holding onto since childhood.

The other thing that is really pissing me off and adding to my misery right now is the insurance process. We spent over $50K to pay for all of this and it is extremely unlikely any of it will be covered. So, on top of recovering and being in pain I have to deal with mounds of red tape, letters to be written, codes to be found, receipts to be sorted through - may of which are in Euros, appeals to make. It is a full time job in itself which my mom is helping with but things are falling through the cracks with both of us working on it. We feel the need to go through the whole, hideous process even though most of my predecessors have not been successful. I probably should delete this post because God Forbid the powers that be at the Insurance Company read anything negative - they'll probably include it in their next denial letter.

On a more positive note, my low back feels pretty good. I sorted through some closets this week and my neck hurt more than my low back. It was sore but not awful.