6.5 months post op

My low back is good - it really only hurts with weather changes so this hurricane season has been tough or too much activity. Its not a constant pain anymore. I continue to core strenghten which is helping. Its going to rain tomorrow so I do feel it a bit now but nothing like pre-surgery. In fact this weekend was great weather and I never felt it at all. Maybe we should relocate somewhere that has no pressure changes.

My neck pain has continued to be terrible. I am having an awful time with the doctors. I had a facet block injection which did not work and in fact caused me to have severe spasms down my right shoulder. At the follow up appt the doctor said he was "at a loss" and offered my nothing but drugs. I refused to accept that option, ended up in a fight with him and am now seeing another doctor in the practice. I am in the process of dealing with the politics of that. New doc wants to do another set of injections which I don't want since the first ones actually caused me to be worse off. But in order to get to the next set of testing one must be a compliant patient and follow protocol. So we'll see where I get with this - no answers yet.

I had the German doctor look at my films and he agrees that they don't inherently look bad enough to perform surgery. However, he understands that given my history my pain is real. I need a cervical discogram done which could confirm my pain level. However, due the somewhat unreliable nature of the test and more to the risk of becoming quadripalegic with this test (2 in 1000 according to one doc) it is tough to get a doctor to perform this test without going through the above protocol.

So in the meantime I continue to be in awe that this has become my life......

6 month post op - status quo - low back good, neck terrible

I saw the doctor this week. The lumbar x-rays look great. The low back is really great - its only sore at times no pain!!! I do feel a lot more popping in my hips, shoulder and wrists than I did presurgery. My arm is still sporadically numb and tingling. My left ankle is sore. So, although my back feels good things are still out of whack for me. But when I wake up in the morning now I often forget I had a low back problem!!!!! Awesome feeling!

However, my neck still hurts at a pain level of 7 most days with no improvement whatsoever. I will have a cortizone injection in the facet joints on Wednesday this week. Let's home that provides some relief. He's the 4th doctor who feels that this neck pain is just coincidence, bad luck, bad genes and bad timing - the neck pain is not a result of the surgery. That is somewhat reassuring if I should need surgery on my neck in the future that it won't necessarily throw off another part of my spine. But I'm not even considering that option at this point.

I am still having severe anxiety as well as a result of all this pain and terrible fear for my future and the future of my family. I had the doctor look at every level of my spine and tell me that no more discs were degenerating. Its so out of my control and logically I know that but its hard to deal with.

But, I'm here, I'm able to enjoy a lot of life and trying to work this all out.

5 month post op - low back good, neck terrible still

I've been doing PT twice a day and only missed one session on the 4th of July. My low back is beginning to show signs of recovery. It's really only sore now, not painful. I can walk from 3-5 miles without pain. My neck still continues to be the main source of my pain. I am at a pain level 6-7 all day particularly on the right side where there is a herniation.
My physical therapist has discharged me. He is a compassionate man who was obviously sad that my neck pain is still so severe. He recommends continuing my therapy at home but feels further medical attention could be necessary. It feels a bit like deja vu on my low back but I'm hoping not to go down that road.

My left leg and foot did get numb and tingling during my walk today but subsided by the end. My ankle has been bothering me but that does not seem related to this more like an overuse feeling. These types of feelings cause a cycle of anxiety in my mind about what problems might be coming.

Despite the severe neck pain, I'm feeling overall positive that this will somehow work itself out. I am thankful that I am here, trying to enjoy as much as I can. Although, I do have pretty severe anxiety I recognize it and am hopeful that its temporary. A great friend of mine is moving away this week which I know is contributing to my uneasy feelings.

My mom has Mandi up north and they seem to be having fun. Even being down one child really helps me.

I appreciate the continued support and prayers. I still need it.

4 months Post Op - Intensive Physical Therapy Continues

I have been religiously following a very targeted Physical Therapy routing for a month now with the new therapist. He is head and shoulders above any others I've seen. I have some minimal improvement in both neck and low back but not nearly where either of us hoped I'd be at this point. I have an hour of neck and core strengthening to work on twice a day and a walk. Some days I can walk 2-3 miles at a decent pace but it usually means the next day I am much slower due to the low back. The therapist is saying I just have to keep working on the strengthening work that he is giving me to increase my endurance. The only reason I am able to stick to this strict regime is due to my mom and her husband who have taken my two little girls with them. If it were not for them, I think I would be stuck in the viscious cycle of daily life getting in the way of this rehabilitation.

We walked all day at Carowinds on Friday and I used a whole tube of Ben Gay to get through it. My left arm went numb that day but I realized that was the first time that had had happened in over a week so that was good news. The neck pain is constant at level 6 all day and gets to an 8 by the night time. Again that is some improvement over my being at painful, crying level pain by mid afternoon.

My low back is averaging a 4-5 but I actually had a day this week where I didn't notice it at all until 3:00 pm which was something that hasn't happend in 3 years so that is pretty great.

The therapist encourages me to stay as active as possible without increasing pain level. He's also helped me through some of the psychological aspects of this too because I'm getting pretty pissed off that I am working so hard and not feeling great results. He understands the whole aspect of looking good yet walking around at a pain level of 7 and feeling so bad and tells me its just a "cross that spinal patients alike have to bear". Put that energy into rehab and it should all fall into place.

Again the only reason I can do any of this is because of my mom, her husband and my husband's support. Thank you all so much!

At this point two spine doctors have read my MRI and neither believe surgery is necessary (thank god) so time will tell where this goes.

Just typing this post hurts the neck so I've got to sign off.

In the meantime my mom and I will be off to the beach with the girls for a few weeks which is always relaxing and a great place to walk.

14 Weeks Post Op - Worse than pre surgery

I just forced myself to walk around the block. My low back is about as bad as it was presurgery -severe pain on the left side. My low back feels like its gone downhill in the past few weeks. I can't say its because I've overdone it because I haven't done much due to my neck pain. So that is really discouraging. My neck is horrible and continues to burn.

I made a macaroni salad for a cookout we are going to later and it took everything I had to do that. I was out of breath , my neck was burning. And yes, we could go to the store to buy it but my girls have been asking for the kind that I make it and I enjoy making it. Its as if I want to prove to myself that I can do something, anything small. But the sad part is that I really can't.

Its also awful because I look absolutely fine. I think its hard for anyone to understand especially if they didn't know me before this all began. I don't want sympathy, I just wish it was more understandable.

My mom is going to take the two littlest girls for the next several weeks. I had to tell my job that I cannot work. These are not decisions that I made lightly - these are horrible choices to have to make. Accepting that I cannot do my job at home with the kids or at work.

This is as much a journal for myself now so that I can chronicle the pain and hopefully look back at this and read that I've made improvements.

Results of Cervical MRI 5-22-08

Well, I had a cervical MRI on Tuesday and we met with the doctor for the results today. I'm not sure what I expected or wanted to hear but MORE PHYSICAL THERAPY was not it.

I have a small bulge at c5-c6. He thinks that is typical for my age and is not the cause of my neck pain. Another reason he doesn't think its this bulge is the fact that it is on the right and my numbness, tingling is on the left. Of course, I can remember the first results of my lumbar MRI and the doctors saying that degeneration at my age is normal. Well that pain was not normal among anyone else my age that I know. So, although I want to believe that I think the jury is still out.

So, he insists that I now see his highly experienced PT for more aggressive treatement. He says this therapist will know in a few weeks if he can fix me. I'm aggravated because I've gone to another PT for several weeks now with no relief and just wish that the doctor had started me with this one to begin with. Now, my kids are out of preschool so I have to hire a sitter and drive to downtown to go to these appointments.

He prescribed Arthrotec and said I should know in a week if that is working.My husband came with me to the appointment. He's normally quiet but this time he explained how this is affecting (ruining) our lives. He's had to stay home from work because I can't take care of the kids. My mom is searching for plane tickets to take the girls up North with her for a long stay to give me relief. We told him I'm crying in pain every night but the doctor just says that its going to take "a lot longer than I would like" to get better.

I can't say much more except that this really SUCKS!!!!

MRI was this morning

I had a cervical MRI this morning. I won't have any results until the doctors appt next Thursday.

I had a Toradol shot last week and started the medrol dosepack this week. The shot helped my low back but not my neck. The medrol hasn't made any difference.

Severe neck pain continues. Its actually a burning now at the back of my neck. And it has moved into the sides and front of my neck which I would describe as a strain. I have a lot of "popping" in my shoulder and hips whenever I move.

Will update after dr. appt next week.

Doctor says its bad genes

I saw the doctor this morning. He xrayd my neck which shows some degeneration at C5-C6 but he doesn't think that is the source of the pain. He feels that is consistent for my age. I'll have an MRI on May 27th which may or may not give us some more insight. If that is inconclusive then he'll order an EMG. He firmly believes that the low back surgery had NOTHING to do with my neck problem. He says its purely coincidental. The bottom line is that he says I have bad back genes.
I am trying so hard to keep positive that this will go away but actually hearing that its unrelated to the surgery has made it harder to believe that.

I follow up with him on June 5th so we'll see where that gets us.

11 weeks post op - Dr. appt in the AM

I have been going to Physical Therapy three times a week for my NECK!!!! Its so ironic. We do some small core strengthening after we've worked my neck but not much. The terrible spasms have subsided but I cannot sleep without muscle relaxers. I am just in shock that this has happened. Surgery on lumbar spine and now I have neck problems which I never had before.

I go to the doctor tomorrow morning and am requesting (demanding if needed) an MRI on my neck. I need to know if there is degeneration there. If it shows nothing then I will have patience that this is going to work itself out over time.

I can barely comment on my low spine because it seems better, sore but not as painful as prior to surgery. However, I have remained so limited in my activity levels its hard to tell where its really at right now.

I will update after the doctor tomorrow. I have to miss Muffins for Mom at my daughters preschool because these appts are so hard to comeby. Luckily I have a dear friend taking her but I do hate how much this has interfered with my family life.

I will finally return to my part time customer service job in June which although I am looking forward to it, will be quite a challenge to sit at the computer as long as may be required.


More tomorrow.

Two months Post Op Update

Well I am on my own and back to life as best as I can. My mom has gone home. The neck continues to be the main source of my pain. Everyone asks but hows the low back - well it feels okay but because of my neck pain I can't really do enough to figure out where my low back stands. I walked on the treadmil today for an hour which equaled 2 miles. My left arm has been numb ever since and I have tingling in my left leg and foot. I am going to Physical Therapy three times a week which is mainly focusing on my neck at this point. I do some minor core strengthening and stretching but I can't do much until we get the neck figured out. I just cannot believe this has happened.

I still have all the same fears and concerns as my last posting, I'm just not as negative right now.

My friends have jumped in where my mom left off and are taking my kids for playdates a lot so I can rest. I accept the help but hate being in this position.

I hoped I'd be better by now but time will tell.

Week 7 - Rollercoaster Ride continues with increase neck pain

Well its been almost 7 weeks and as you read last week I was feeling real positive about my recovery and future outlook. This week - not so much. I've had neck pain for about a month now. My neck first began hurting about a week after I was home from Germany. I thought it was too much lying down and watching TV at eye level (I was dying to watch all the shows I had TIVO'd while I was gone - all they had in English over there was CNN) so we moved the TV up high like you'd see in a hospital. As the pain continued, I attributed it to the fact that I was walking and doing more so my muscles were overcompensating for my weak low back. As time progresses, this pain is becoming reminiscent of my initial low back pain years ago. It feels discogenic in nature now not muscular. The doctor last week thought it might be nerve related because my arms and hands are still feeling tingling and was too early for MRI which would be the only real diagnostic tool. I start PT on Monday and will continue that until I see the doctor again in exactly a month from now. I am EXTREMELY worried that my neck may have had "bad" discs just "waiting" to "go out". And that the added pressure on my neck has caused that to happen. Last week I talked to my girls about planting a vegetable garden next year, they want a dog which we haven't promised but its in our plans when I feel better, Disney World etc. etc. Now I'm back to thinking that I am going to have to go through this whole process with my neck? Is my life just going to be a long battle with back pain. If so, how am I going to get through it. Although this is not a life threatening condition it is certainly life altering and it REALLY SUCKS.

Dave my husband who has remained postivie thoughout and still continues to believe that I do not have neck degeneration says that he will eat meat during lent next year if my neck has been compromised. We don't attend church or follow any organized religion so now he may lose what little faith he has been holding onto since childhood.

The other thing that is really pissing me off and adding to my misery right now is the insurance process. We spent over $50K to pay for all of this and it is extremely unlikely any of it will be covered. So, on top of recovering and being in pain I have to deal with mounds of red tape, letters to be written, codes to be found, receipts to be sorted through - may of which are in Euros, appeals to make. It is a full time job in itself which my mom is helping with but things are falling through the cracks with both of us working on it. We feel the need to go through the whole, hideous process even though most of my predecessors have not been successful. I probably should delete this post because God Forbid the powers that be at the Insurance Company read anything negative - they'll probably include it in their next denial letter.

On a more positive note, my low back feels pretty good. I sorted through some closets this week and my neck hurt more than my low back. It was sore but not awful.

Week Six Update - Turning a Corner

Its been almost six weeks since surgery and I'm doing really well. I can walk nearly two miles and sitting tolerance is increasing. I haven't had any painkillers since the leg issues. I've had about 5 nights of muscle relaxers because my neck is bothering me. The neck muscles are tense and one vertabrae hurts. I have occassional numbness in my left arm all the way to my fingers. I had my appt with Dr. Murray at OrthoCarolina on Wedesday. He took new xrays which he said look excellent. He thinks I am moving around very well. He believes the neck is still related to the nerve changes and should subside. He thought the egg sized lump at my abdomen looked worse in pictures and believes it may go down after several months. He has seen it before and believes it to be a result of the "sewing up" after surgery. If it doesn't go away, he'll send me to his vascular surgeon. He's referred me for PT which I'll start next week. And he'll willingly follow up with me in six weeks. He is by far the best, most compassionate spine doctor I have seen. With his credentials he certainly has the right to have the "god complex" that I've had to endure with so many surgeons but its just not his nature. Dave left the appointment saying he just wanted to hug him. It's great to know that there are still doctors out there like him. The whole experience has lifted my spirits. Thanks again to Mark Mintzer of Global Patient Network for arranging this.

I've been able to stay up and about for the full days, drive myself around now, clean up a bit. I still have soreness most of the day but nothing unbearable. Ice and heat are relieving it. One friend saw me in Target on Saturday and couldn't believe how well I was moving around. However, on Sunday I sneezed in Walmart and my left side really hurt. My back lets me know when I've done too much so I don't think I will overdo it.

I have been saying for the past 3 years that our move here to Charlotte hasn't ever felt like home (Boston) for me but at a time like this its getting close. The support that I have received from friends, neighbors, coworkers and acquaintances has been unbelievable! They are bringing meals, joining me for walks, and going out of their way to provide moral support. I am so thankful to my family and friends - near, far and online for all they have done.

My mom will be returning next week with the two little girls and I told her that I am ready to take back my duties. We'll do it slowly but I am finally feeling like I can take care of my family again which is nice.

I am turning a corner, haven't made it all the way around that corner yet but I feel optimistic that its coming.

Week 4 Post Op Update - Walking and Sitting Tolerance is increasing

It's 4 weeks from surgery today and I continue to recover. I can walk about 45 minutes before I feel pain. I can sit 20-30 depending on how much I've done in the day. I've only needed two painkillers this week which was for the leg issues at night. I haven't had the leg pain in two nights now so hopefully that is on the upswing as well. I am getting up and out a bit more. We went to WalMart yesterday - I had to leave the store and go to the car before my husband checked out though due to pain after 50 minutes.

I am still not better than pre-surgery and that is a milestone I look forward to hitting.

I sent the pictures of the egg sized lump at my incision site to Dr. B's office. They believe it to be muscle hernia which will require further surgery to correct though primarily cosmetic. My family doctor has looked at it and also feels its a cosmetic issue. I am going to see a new spine surgeon next week to confirm this diagnosis. I have to thank Mark Mintzer of Global Patient Network and ispine.org for connecting me with a spine surgeon in my area. My own spine doctor had rejected me once I made the decision to go to Germany. I left for surgery concerned but given my limted options, I decided to just hoped for the best and that I wouldn't need a spine surgeon upon my return. Mark contacted a top doctor here who he has worked with in the past to ask if he'd be willing to follow up with me. The doctors office called me the next day to set up my appt. This is amazing because most doctors are unwilling to take on other doctors follow up care. The doctor trained in Straubing with Dr. B so I feel confident he will be best suited to care for me. I'll let you know the results next week.

I should also point out that I am not a client of Mark's or GPN. He has so kindly and compassionately helped me out. THANK YOU MARK!!!!

Week 3 Post Op Update

Today is three weeks exactly from surgery. I've been home for a week. The pain is getting better. It's more sore in the low back area than pain for now. I've walked about 15 minutes at a time without much pain just muscle soreness. My back does feel that if I did too much it would hurt again quickly though I haven't tested that theory. About 3 nights ago I did start getting what I call "weird leg shit". I believe the technical term is Distraction Pain :) Its not so much pain as it is something taking over my legs - much like what Restless Leg Syndrome must feel like. Its tingling, wanting to move and a general feeling that something large is inside my legs wanting to crawl out. My hands also have numbness on and off. The pain meds relieved it the first two nights but not last night. Overall though I can say that I've made progress on the low back pain front which is a good step because I wasn't so sure that was ever going to happen. I can sit for 10 minutes or so now without pain. That's alot longer than the nothing that I could do back at the hotel.

Went to doctor today

I went to my family physician today for a follow up check up. I have had floaters in my eyes ever since the surgery. He checked that out and didn't find anything wrong with my retina. He recommended seeing an eye doctor if they are still there in a few weeks. I also had him look at my incision because when I stand up there is an egg sized lump at the top of it. He called it weakening of the muscle inside the abdominal wall. He didn't think it was a hernia or anything to worry about but he doesn't think it will go away completely . This lump has been there all along but its only noticeable when I stand up and look down or from the side view. And since the swelling from the incision is gone I think its more prominent now. I'll send a picture along to ProSpine tomorrow.

I spoke with both Chuck and David today - we all agreed that my perceived lack of progress is due to the fact that my disks were so degenerated and collapsed that my recovery will take time. I know its true but its hard to watch my family going on around me.

Geoff and Family - please see my response to your comment yesterday on the comment board.


Also, I may not be posting everyday now if there is nothing new. Don't want to bore you all!!!

Maybe the plane caught up with me

Well its raining (really heavily) today or maybe it was a delay from the plane but its not been a good one. I've been in bed most of the day. I walked to the bus stop but that was it.

Hopefully with all the rest I had today tomorrow will be better.

Back Home Safe and Sound 2 weeks post op

We made it home safely last night. The flight was not a whole lot of fun but I got through it. Unfortunately we were on an older US Air plane that did not have the upgraded first class seats which fully recline. We had seen those seats on our flight to Germany so I expected thats what I'd have on the way back and it would've made a huge difference in my comfort level. I had that new seat on the short flight from philly to charlotte and it was great.

The girls waited up for me and it was great to see them.

I don't feel much worse for the wear today given that yeserday was so long. Dave took the day off and walked around the block with me. I got another one of those left groin pains so I had to lean on him to fininsh the walk. I sat on ice when I got home and feel okay. The weather is beautiful here today so I have been able to sit outside and relax.

Thanks everyone for all of your support. Thanks Chuck and David and Mark for holding my hand through this.

We are at Munich Airport Day 13

The past few days have been uneventful and restful. We are at the airport now and all is well. Peter did get me a wheelchair and Jean is pushing me around. I am up and walking around the 1st class lounge now to move around before the long flight. I feel pretty good going into this. Sore and a little pain but not terrible.

Time to get a german beer. Jeans is learning how to pour them from the tap from fellow German passengers seems there is a skill to this.

Will post from the states tomorrow.

Internet is down

Hi, We are fine here status quo. The internet is down in the hotel and will likely be until Monday. I am using the receptionists dial up line now so do not plan to hear from me until we get to the airport in Philly. We cannot phone out of our romms but we can receive calls in if you need to reach us.

Day 10 a little better

I was able to sit through breakfast and dinner without the excruciating pain. The past few days I really went downhill right after breakfast and it didnt happen so much today. This of course is all relative to the past few days. Im still bringing 3 pillows to the table - one to sit on and two behind me, it hurts but its not agony so I am headed in the right direction.

It was still more of the same Eat, Walk, Rest, Repeat. Tomorrow will be a repeat of today.

I packed a couple of things today so that I dont wear myself out doing it all on Saturday.

Yes David, Jean and I have been laughing because now my husband is quoting ya'll with "slow and steady wins the race" in his emails - too funny.

Day nine Post Op visit

We went to the Pro Spine Offices in Bogen today for my final check up. Dr. Fenk-Mayer examined me and said all was normal and as to be expected. She removed the bottom stitch and says the others will dissolve. The incision is healing nicely. She felt that the low back pain was normal inflammation from the surgery not discogenic. To me it feels exactly the same as the pain prior to surgery so I cannot help but worry that this did not work. Rationally, logically I know its early on but I worry anyway.

The rest of the day has been about the same eat, walk, rest,repeat.

We leave here on Sunday. The next few days will be more of the above in hopes that I can feel comfortable on the flight.

Day eight satus quo

Today has been about the same as yesterday. Short Walk, Eat, Rest, Repeat two times. I am hoping for a small improvement soon. Any little bit would help.

After dinner last night Jean and I went around the block and I did get a stabbing pain in my left groin which had me holding on to the fence next to me, not sure if I could take another step and brought me to tears. It left as quickly as it came on though so we got through it.

Tomorrow we go to Bogen for the final check at ProSpine.

Day seven a little bit better than yesterday

After dinner last night I was feeling better by the hour. When I finally went to bed after watching an entire season of Sex and the City on DVD I couldnt believe how much better my back felt. I woke up feeling really great. Then after breakfast it went downhill. I was able to walked a little but I cannot sit at all. I type this from the computer in the lobby that is condusive to standing. Its continues to be just the low back pain. No leg issues. The incision is healing nicely, it hurts but as expected I believe. All of the doctors were in awe at how straight it is. Jean and I laugh constantly as we remember each of their faces as the bandage was removed and they admired the work. I could care less what that looks like at this point.

There is a mental side to this no doubt. Did I drink some adr kool-aid? Am I going to be able to take care of my kids? Its brutal but Jean is here to help me through it all with humor.

We really are taking it so slowly.

Day six post op not good

Well, did I say the pain was tolerable yesterday? No true today. Jean and I walked a short distance to dinner last night and I could not sit. I had to circle the restaurant several times. while I understand this is normal I need to get this chronicled for future patients. It is a rollercoaster. Today has been m0re of the same. Walking a little and resting in bed. I am having a stronger med filled tomorrow. The post op medication situation is interesting here because they assume you are still taking any meds that you took at home prior to surgery. They will also prescribe you whatever necessary but the brand names are different. I never found much that worked real well on this level of pain at home without throwing up so I am relying on their prescriptions here. The opiod they gave me in the hospital worked well and I will take it tomorrow if needed. For reference pharmacies are closed on Saturday by noon and after that everything must be ordered on an emergency basis to the onlý on call pharmacy in town and at extra cost. Eckhard will help with this process but its just that a process you do not want to go through when in pain. Controlled substances are even more difficult to order so plan accordingly when leaving the hospital. They hand you the prescriptions in plenty of time so have them filled or have your meds from home.

I read through David and Chucks post op links last night with Jean and we both felt so much better because so much of it sounded so familiar - the late night waking, the coughing in pain etc.

Thanks for all the kind words.

I'm out of the hospital!!!!

It's Saturday afternoon and we are back at the hotel. Obviously I am in pain but it is tolerable right now. I get tired easily, move extremely slowly and cannnot bend at all. I am to wear a back brace (much like you see a weightlifter wear) for 8 weeks. The disks will not be fully set for 3 months. In speaking with Dr. B 3 days post op, he believes I should feel like myself in 4-6 months given the length of time I suffered from this and level of degeneration of the disks. He felt the surgery was difficult due to the limited space left between my disks yet nothing he did not expect or has not seen before. He felt I was a relatively uncomplicated case. They describe my recovery as uneventful. Good news but certainly not what my body says.

My aunt Jean has been amazing and because of her we have been able to laugh so much I have to worry about my stitches. She befriended the hospital staff to the point they would get in trouble for lingering with us. This has been a great time for the two of us to spend together. Many of you probably did not realize she is only 4 years older so shes much like a sister. She did it all for me here. she was there to take care of me without battng an eye. There is no way to thank her enough.


Obviously there is an important 6 days missing here that needs to be chronicled for any future patient - too much for me to handle now but if you are reading this and thinking of doing this please feel free to contact me. Past patients made a huge impact on me and I am here for the next. Mark and Chuck thank you for keeping in touch with my family. It is so inspiring to read about Marks progress as he had the same two levels done as I did. I hope to reach that level long term as well.

I spoke with my mom and Dave and heard all of your well wishes. Thank you all so much for the support. I will need more to come, this is just the beginning.

We are heading to the hospital this morning

Well, we had a great day yesterday walking around town. We spent hours trying to find the Deutche Bank machine that mom had google mapped for us but of course we forgot to bring when we left. We asked many Germmans directions but no one who spoke English knew. Althought the hotel and cab driver speak English we are finding that in the shops and restaurants there is a large language barrier. I was not expecting this. The year I spent travelling in Europe many years ago was mostly in big cities so we always found that many people spoke English.

Well, I'm off to the hospital. More news when I can.

Here's a view of Straubing

Straubing CenterHotel Romerhof

Jean and Elvis

The beer is not warm

Theres been a lot of questions about the beer. We had a Weissen Licht last night for my bday dinner and it was not warm. Tasted great. We explored the town a bit and came home to sleep early. We both woke up in the middle of the night at different times thinking it was morning. We just had european style breakfast and are heading out to explore a bit more again.

Today, the drs tell me to be careful what I eat as tomorrow I will be admitted to the hospital for the colon cleanse.

We Made it to Germany - Surgery is Monday the 18th

Our flights were uneventful. We were greeted in Munich by Peter Hoch the cab driver for all of Dr B's patients. He is fabulous and knows exactly how to treat a patient. We drove on the autobahn at 100MPH. He took us through Straubing which is an adorable European town center with cafes and shops. We are at the Hotel near the hospital now. The staff is great. The last patient left an extra shot that she had for the next patient - we are a bit concerned about needing that and of course will take it to Dr. B.

We are going to stay awake the rest of today and get to bed early. We are going to head into town now.

I head to the hospital on Sunday morning and surgery is on Monday at noon here which is six hours ahead.

We are doing great so far. I'll try to get some pics up soon.

Cake for breakfast

The girls really wanted to celebrate my birthday before I left. Since they were out to dinner with Mimi last night we just had to eat ice cream cake for breakfast this morning.

All bags are packed and I'm just waiting for Dave to come pick me up to head to the airport.

More soon......

Mom is here

Well she made it thank God. She had to stay overnight in a hotel but we are so happy she got here on time - she brought me so many perfectly useful items for the trip - a great carryon bag, matching security type wallet, a warm coat, power converters and a laptop and a small camera and some comfortable warm boots. Everything is perfect! She's off with the kids now - don't know what I'd do without her.

Thanks to everyone for all of the support. Monique showed up last night just as I was freaking out about my mom's flight with a goody bag containing stress relief items - how timely! And Christy filled me a surcy (I think that's what she called it here in the south) which is a fabulous goody bag. The church that I have only minimally participated in is so kindly sending dinners while I'm gone. I cannot believe how much support I have gotten through all of this.

I just want to thank you all for the parting gifts, kind words, beautiful written cards, phone calls, emails, positive thoughts and engery you've sent my way. Although I may not have gotten back to you at this time, it means so much to me. Keep it coming!

I've checked in online and am going to finish some packing and maybe have time for a Valentines dinner with my husband.

first bump in the road

My mom is stranded in New York. All flights to Charlotte are cancelled today. She was coming here to "hold down the fort" for me tomorrow. And I left a lot of holding down to do. She also has several items with her that I need for my trip so lets hope she can get here tomorrow.

Time for a cocktail..........

to my far away family and friends

My email has been loaded with questions mostly from my far away friends and family who only had partial knowledge of my situation:

I'll need to explain the complex decision making progress at another time but in a nutshell: the limited options here in the US due to FDA regulations, health insurance coverage and doctor expertise led me to begin extensive research and ultimately choose Artificial Disk Replacement with the world's leading doctor in this area. I believe this is my best chance at long term health. If this doesn't work then nothing will and that will be that. I won't have to second guess anything.

I will be in Straubing, Germany until March 2nd. I should be 5-7 days in the hospital and 5-7 at the hotel with my aunt Jean. I haven't been able to spend quality time with my aunt in years and really am looking forward to that. She's my dad's youngest sister so we can laugh and share our memories of him. Dave was so squeamish when I had my kids that I really didn't think he was the best person to come with me - he's wonderful in every other way but neither one of us felt compelled for him to go. My mom will be here with the kids while he keeps working. And lord knows we need that since this surgery/travel is $50K paid up front and out of pocket. We are appealing insurance but precedent is not looking good for reimbursement.

This is a serious and major surgery. Recovery time is LONG. There will be a vertical incision in my abdomen (because the artificial disks are inserted through the front). I won't be driving for at least 4 weeks. It can be a year or more before I'm feeling whatever my new normal will be. I will never run a marathon but I hope that I can wake up and get out of bed without feeling the severe pain I feel now. Some days it brings me near tears to get out of my bed. Most days its not quite that bad but the pain is always there. Today there is rain and I've been in very bad shape since yesterday because of that. It's hard to be upbeat and positive and smiling and hold a family together when you feel this way. It literally sucks the life out of you. I hope I can stop faking my smiles and truly feel good again someday.

4 days until Germany

Well, its all been done. The only thing left is to pack my bags. I'm scared to death but hopeful. I feel there are 3 stages left. Get through the surgery with no complications, get home safely and the longest stage is recovery. It's #1 thats got me a nervous wreck at this point.